Hmmm...I wonder if the hotel rooms in London are equipped with waste
     baskets (one of which could have been used as a repository for the
     extra soap), or plastic laundry bags, (which would have served as tony
     wrapping paper for a *Gift of Soap* to the front office manager upon
     check-out).

     BTW, this would have NEVER occurred in a California hotel...can you
     guess why? ;-)

     PM


______________________________ Reply Separator _________________________________
Subject: (HU)MORE :)
Author:  Costas Anastassiades <[log in to unmask]> at internet
Date:    11/12/97 11:58 PM


Couldn't resist forwarding this to the list ...

>Attached is some correspondence which actually occurred between a
>London hotel's staff and one of its guests.  The London hotel involved
>submitted this to the Sunday Times.  No name was mentioned.
>
>
>Dear Maid,
>Please do not leave any more of those little bars of soap in my
>bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial.  Please remove
>the six unopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest
>and another three in the shower soap dish.  They are in my way.
>
>Thank you,
> S. Berman
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Room 635,
>I am not your regular maid.  She will be back tomorrow, Thursday, from
>her day off.  I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dish as
>you requested.  The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put
>on top of your Kleenex dispenser in case you should change your mind.
>This leaves only the 3 bars I left today which my instructions from the
>management is to leave 3 soaps daily.
>
>I hope this is satisfactory.
> Kathy, Relief Maid
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Maid -- I hope you are my regular maid.
>Apparently Kathy did not tell you about my note to her concerning the
>little bars of soap.  When I got back to my room this evening I found
>you had added 3 little Camays to the shelf under my medicine cabinet.
>I am going to be here in the hotel for two weeks and have brought my
>own bath-size Dial so I won't need those 6 little Camays which are on
>the shelf.  They are in my way when shaving, brushing teeth, etc.
>
>Please remove them.
> S. Berman
>
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>
>
>
>Dear Mr. Berman,
>My day off was last Wed. so the relief maid left 3 hotel soaps which
>we are instructed by the management.  I took the 6 soaps which were
>in your way on the shelf and put them in the soap dish where your Dial
>was.  I put the Dial in the medicine cabinet for your convenience.
>
>I didn't remove the 3 complimentary soaps which are always placed
>inside the medicine cabinet for all new check-ins and which you did
>not object to when you checked in last Monday.  Please let me
>know if I can of further assistance.
>
>
>Your regular maid,
> Dotty
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Mr. Berman,
>The assistant manager, Mr. Kensedder, informed me this A.M. that you
>called him last evening and said you were unhappy with your maid
>service.  I have assigned a new girl to your room.  I hope you will
>accept my apologies for any past inconvenience.  If you have any future
>complaints please contact me so I can give it my personal attention.
>Call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM.  Thank you.
>
>Elaine Carmen
> Housekeeper
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Miss Carmen,
>It is impossible to contact you by phone since I leave the hotel for
>business at 745 AM and don't get back before 530 or 6PM.  That's the
>reason I called Mr. Kensedder last night.  You were already off duty.
>I only asked Mr. Kensedder if he could do anything about those
>little bars of soap.  The new maid you assigned me must have thought I
>was
>a new check-in today, since she left another 3 bars of hotel soap in
>my medicine cabinet along with her regular delivery of 3 bars on the
>bath-room shelf.  In just 5 days here I have accumulated 24 little
>bars of soap.  Why are you doing this to me?
>
> S. Berman
>
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Mr. Berman,
>Your maid, Kathy, has been instructed to stop delivering soap to your
>room and remove the extra soaps.  If I can be of further assistance,
>please call extension 1108 between 8AM and 5PM.  Thank you,
>
> Elaine Carmen,
> Housekeeper
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>Dear Mr. Kensedder,
>My bath-size Dial is missing.  Every bar of soap was taken from my
>room including my own bath-size Dial.  I came in late last night and had
>to call the bellhop to bring me 4 little Cashmere Bouquets.
> S. Berman
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Mr. Berman,
>I have informed our housekeeper, Elaine Carmen, of your soap problem.
>I cannot understand why there was no soap in your room since our maids
>are instructed to leave 3 bars of soap each time they service a room.
>The situation will be rectified immediately.  Please accept my
>apologies for the inconvenience.
>
>Martin L. Kensedder
> Assistant Manager
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Mrs. Carmen,
>Who the hell left 54 little bars of Camay in my room?  I came in last
>night and found 54 little bars of soap.  I don't want 54 little bars
>of Camay.  I want my one damn bar of bath-size Dial.  Do you realize
>I have 54 bars of soap in here.  All I want is my bath size Dial.
>
>Please give me back my bath-size Dial.
>
> S. Berman
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>
>
>
>
>Dear Mr. Berman,
>You complained of too much soap in your room so I had them removed.
>Then you complained to Mr. Kensedder that all your soap was missing
>so I personally returned them.  The 24 Camays which had been taken and
>the 3 Camays you are supposed to receive daily (sic).  I don't know
>anything about the 4 Cashmere Bouquets.  Obviously your maid, Kathy,
>did not know I had returned your soaps so she also brought 24 Camays
>plus the 3 daily Camays.  I don't know where you got the idea this
>hotel issues bath-size Dial.  I was able to locate some bath-size
>Ivory which I left in your room.
>
> Elaine Carmen
> Housekeeper
>
>----------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>Dear Mrs. Carmen,
>Just a short note to bring you up-to-date on my latest soap inventory.
>As of today I possess:
>
>- On shelf under medicine cabinet - 18 Camay in 4 stacks of
>  4 and 1 stack of 2.
>- On Kleenex dispenser - 11 Camay in 2 stacks of 4 and 1
>  stack of 3.
>- On bedroom dresser - 1 stack of 3 Cashmere Bouquet, 1
>  stack of 4 hotel-size Ivory, and 8 Camay in 2 stacks of 4.
>- Inside medicine cabinet - 14 Camay in 3 stacks of 4 and 1
>  stack of 2.
>- In shower soap dish - 6 Camay, very moist.
>- On northeast corner of tub - 1 Cashmere Bouquet, slightly used.
>- On northwest corner of tub - 6 Camays in 2 stacks of 3.
>
>Please ask Kathy when she services my room to make sure the stacks
>are neatly piled and dusted.  Also, please advise her that stacks of
>more
>than 4 have a tendency to tip.  May I suggest that my bedroom window
>sill is not in use and will make an excellent spot for future soap
>deliveries. One more item, I have purchased another bar of bath-sized
>Dial which I am keeping in the hotel vault in order to avoid further
>misunderstandings.
>
>S. Berman
>