My own all time best....on an IBM RJE terminal 700miles from the system, talking to on site operator on a tty console
Me: what does the console say?
OP: cant read it.
Me: is it typing something?
Op: yes, but I cant read it...
Me: type 'lpstatus' (or whatever the command was)
OP: did that, still cant read it.
Me: the head moves, but you cant read it?
Op: correct
Me: why cant you read it? is there an ink ribbon in it?
Op: yes
....pauses to ruminate on what could be wrong
Me: when you type a command, the head moves, makes a noise, strikes the paper on the platen/roller?
Op: Paper? All I can see is a black roller thingy......
duhhhhh...
-----Original Message-----
From: HP-3000 Systems Discussion [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Chuck Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, 18 June 2008 7:44 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: [HP3000-L] OT: Tuesday Humor
My favorites:
User: I tried to run your application but it won't work.
Me: What happens when you double-click the icon?
User: It shows a box on the screen.
Me: What does the box say?
User: I don't know.
Me: Run the program again.
User: Ok.
Me: Do you see the box?
User: Yes.
Me: What does it say?
User: I don't know.
Me: Can you see the box?
User: Yes.
Me: Does it have words in it?
User: Yes.
Me: What do they say?
User: I don't know.
Me: Did you ever learn to read?
User: *SLAM'S DOWN PHONE*
Me: *WAITS*
Boss: Can I see you in my office?
Or
Manager: I need to know when you are going to have that system completed.
Me: I am still not clear on exactly what your requirements are.
Manager: We are struggling with that, but I don't want it to hold up development.
Me: .....
-----Original Message-----
From: HP-3000 Systems Discussion [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Craig Lalley
Sent: Tuesday, June 17, 2008 2:52 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: OT: Tuesday Humor
That reminds me, a couple of decades ago...
Me: "type showjob"
User: "OK, nothing happened"
Me: "type S H O W J O B"
User: "nothing happened"
Me: "type S H O W J O B then hit return"
User: "you never said hit return"
-Craig
--- On Tue, 6/17/08, Paul Edwards <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> From: Paul Edwards <[log in to unmask]>
> Subject: OT: Tuesday Humor
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Date: Tuesday, June 17, 2008, 1:06 PM
> Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the
> desktop."
> Customer: "Ok."
> Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
> Customer: "No."
> Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a
> pop-up menu?"
> Customer: "No."
> Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have
> done up until this
> point?"
> Customer: "Sure, you told me to write ´click´ and I
> wrote ´click´."
>
> ***************************************************************
> CDR Paul Edwards USNR Ret. HP 3000 Certified
> Consultant
> Paul Edwards & Associates
> 1506 Estates Way Phone: (972) 242-6660
> Carrollton TX 75006 Cel : (214) 384-8728
> Email: [log in to unmask] Web : www.peassoc.com
> ***************************************************************
>
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