HP3000-L Archives

July 2005, Week 4

HP3000-L@RAVEN.UTC.EDU

Options: Use Monospaced Font
Show Text Part by Default
Show All Mail Headers

Message: [<< First] [< Prev] [Next >] [Last >>]
Topic: [<< First] [< Prev] [Next >] [Last >>]
Author: [<< First] [< Prev] [Next >] [Last >>]

Print Reply
Subject:
From:
Tracy Pierce <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Tracy Pierce <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Mon, 25 Jul 2005 10:39:07 -0700
Content-Type:
text/plain
Parts/Attachments:
text/plain (107 lines)
just luck, I excerpted the id104 text before it disappeared:
Airplane Humor

In his book, Sled Driver, SR-71 Blackbird pilot Brian Shul writes: "I'll
always remember a certain radio exchange that occurred one day as Walt (my
back-seater) and I were screaming across Southern California 13 miles high.
We were monitoring various radio transmissions from other aircraft as we
entered Los Angeles airspace. Though they didn't really control us, they did
monitor our movement across their scope.

I heard a Cessna ask for a readout of its ground speed."90 knots" Center
replied. "Moments later, a Twin Beech required the same." "120 knots,"
Center answered.

We weren't the only ones proud of our ground speed that day as almost
instantly an F-18 smugly transmitted, 'Ah, Center, Dusty 52 requests ground
speed readout. "There was a slight pause, then the response, "525 knots on
the ground, Dusty."


"Another silent pause. As I was thinking to myself how ripe a situation this
was, I heard a familiar click of a radio transmission coming from my
back-seater. It was at that precise moment I realized Walt and I had
become a real crew, for we were both thinking in unison." "Center, Aspen 20,
you got a ground speed readout for us?" There was a longer than normal pause
.... "Aspen, I show 1,742 knots"


No further inquiries were heard on that frequency.
--------------------------------------------------
In another famous SR-71 story, Los Angeles Center reported receiving a
request for clearance to FL 60 (60,000ft). The incredulous controller, with
some disdain in his voice, asked, "How do you plan to get up to 60,000 feet?
The pilot (obviously a sled driver), responded, "We don't plan to go up to
it, we plan to go down to it." He was cleared.
-------------------------------------
The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed
it on top of the instrument panel, and then asked the navigator, "Do you
know what I use this for?" The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it
for?" The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!" The
navigator proceeded to pull out a 45 and place it on his chart table. The
pilot asked, "What's that for?" "To be honest sir," the navigator replied,
"I'll know we're lost before you will."
--------------------------------------------------
Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!" Delta 351:"Give
us another hint! We have digital watches!"
---------------------------------------------------
One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of
the runway while a MD80 landed. The MD80 landed, rolled out, turned around,
and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the MD80
crew got on the radio and said, "What a cute little plane. Did you make it
all by yourself?"
Our hero the Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back
with: "I made it out of MD80 parts. Another landing like that and I'll have
enough parts for another one."
--------------------------------------------------
There's a story about the military pilot calling for a priority landing
because his single-engine jet fighter was running "a bit peaked."
Air Traffic Control told the fighter jock that he was number two behind a
B-52 that had one engine shut down. "Ah," the pilot remarked, "the dreaded
seven-engine approach."
----------------------------------------------
A student became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting
to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, "What was your last known
position?" Student: "When I was number one for takeoff."
--------------------------------------------------
Taxiing down the tarmac, the 757 abruptly stopped, turned around and
returned to the gate. After an hour-long wait, it finally took off. A
concerned passenger asked the flight attendant , "What was the problem?"
"The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," explained the
flight attendant," and it took us a while to find a new pilot."
--------------------------------------------------
"Flight 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees." "But Center, we
are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?" "Sir, have you ever
heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?"




> -----Original Message-----
> From: Roy Brown [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
> Sent: Sunday, July 24, 2005 11:52 AM
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: [Possible SPAM] Re: OT: Fun space shuttle facts!
>
> In message <[log in to unmask]>, Greg Stigers
> <[log in to unmask]> writes
> >Is it one of these?
> >http://www.theabsurdreport.com/id104.html
>
> Judging from the 404, apparently not :-(
>
> Dropping the /id104.html reveals that the site is now a single 'Under
> reconstruction' page.
>
> --
> Roy Brown        'Have nothing in your houses that you do not
> know to be
> Kelmscott Ltd     useful, or believe to be beautiful'  William Morris
>
> * To join/leave the list, search archives, change list settings, *
> * etc., please visit http://raven.utc.edu/archives/hp3000-l.html *
>

* To join/leave the list, search archives, change list settings, *
* etc., please visit http://raven.utc.edu/archives/hp3000-l.html *

ATOM RSS1 RSS2