Hi Huw,
You've been in my back yard...kindov.......and practically passed my door to
get there!

lotsa snips...
> the West coast.  These were the scariest dives I've done to date, and the
> trip was in danger of turning into 'The Muppets go Diving' at a couple of
> points, but all turned out OK in the end...  I've tried to analyse where I
> did something wrong, any advice or tips will be gratefully received.

All normal.....all experience!  <wg>

> Water temps were a consistent 12-13 degrees, visibility poor by usual
> Western Scotland standards at 3-4 metres.  the weather was patchy sun and
> showers, the water green and gritty but the wind stayed away and the seas
> were calm.  Tanks, weights, trilaminate drysuit and thinsulate all rented.

Yep! All normal!.........but dont like the rented bit.
You really have to become very confident about dry suits/tanks/weights.

> Dive 1 - The Breda

One of my favs!

> top storey, the side is torn into huge holes by the Navy, looking for a
> missing diver, never found.

Did you see the plaque for two divers lost on the Breda about 5years ago?
They were found the following year!

>
> At 70 BAR, ask Vicky if she has any idea where the shotline is.  Not a
> clue, neither do I.  No problem, unclip my DSMB and, ever the gentleman,
> offer Vicky first pick of reel or inflation duties.  'huh'? she replies.
> Sheesh, now have to teach a buddy to fire a blob underwater!  :-)

Arghhhhhhh...........biggest cause of uw accidents ie fast ascents, is
uncontrolled use of DSMBs.
>
> Dive 2 - The Hispania.

I used to love the Hiispania!
>
> We are supposed to be here at slack tide, but if this was slack, I'm a
> banana.

Andy sometimes doesn't catch that slack water!
But he is a good skipper1

  Vicky and I haul ourselves down the near-horizontal shotline
> against the current to the wreck.  About half way down, a jellyfish the
> size of a dinner plate

Usually like dustbin lids!
>
> The superstructure of the wreck is a beautiful and fascinating jumble of
> posts, ribs and and frames trailing kelp and dead mans fingers,

Its the fast moving currents which keep the viz on this wreck soooo good!
>
> Dive 3 - The Breda.
>
> All goes to plan until about 25 minutes in when we have risen back on to
> the deck area at 15m or so.  I'm feeling a bit positive, so first dump try
> to my wing (empty) then try to dump from my suit.  Though I can feel the
> gas sloshing around in the arm, despite arm waving and bashing the valve
> with my fist, it's just not coming out!  I grab at the cuff, but I've put
> my compass strap over the seal, and for one very nasty moment I think I'm
> on the fast track to the surface.

Oooh.nasty............
Have you bought your own suit yet?
Consider getting an auto dump!
>
> Dive 4 - Ard Ne Cuile (scenic)
> 17.6m for 11 min.  12l of nitrox 32.
>
> the cliff, having re-descended to try and find me.  Well, the dive is
over,
> and here come the Muppets - badumadum - ba - ba - badada!

Chuckle!

> Crab, Urchins, Squat Lobster, Crown of Thorns

You sure about that one?  more likely to be a Common Sunstar which has
between 8 and 13 arms!

> Some good dives, some 'learning experiences', still addicted...  :-)

I'll bet!
I really enjoyed your report - thanks!
cheers,
Carol