While trying to nod off to sleep last night I was thinking about the knots
I know - bowline, clove hitch, blood knot .. how to tie off the boat at the
jetty, etc, etc .. and I started to laugh about some of the funny things I
have witnessed involving boats.

Actually I will start with myself. Ready for takeoff I untied the stern
rope & chucked it in to the back of the boat. Then untied the bow line
readying myself to push the boat away from the jetty before jumping on
front when the skipper said "castaway". Right at the wrong moment someone
from shore called out to me just as the skipper yelled his instructions
through the window & I mistimed my jump. Not wanting to do the splits with
a full audience on the shore I did my best to hang on to the boat rails.
Half falling in to the water while the boat was slowly pulling out in
reverse I did my best to *gracefully* monkey-it up, and received a roaring
clap of hands & comments when I did so safely. Ive never done that ever
again ;-)

Some of the funniest things Ive witnessed (and not done myself thankfully)
are:

*Seen a newbie yachtie throw the anchor overboard .. rope and all .. but
not tied on.

*Seen a professional UW photographer slip his housed camera system over the
side of the rubberduck and found, on backflipping in to the water, that he
had forgotten to tie it on coz the camera wasnt hanging where it should
have been. While he searched for his camera in the kelp we continued on
diving under the Busselton Jetty. We were not game to offer to help him
look for it as he wasnt the type of person to be around when he was in a
filthy rage so no one dared mentioned the incident during that 3 day dive
trip.

*While tying up in a pen at Rottnest Island heard the funniest conversation
between the Jetty Master (JM) & someone who obviously had more $ than
brains.
JM yells across to the 28 foot long speedboat, which is holding off waiting
for a pen to become vacant. "Sorry the pens are all booked out for the long
weekend holidays. Go in to shore over there and anchor in a safe spot".
Speedboat owner "I dont have an anchor. What do I do?"
There are gasps of amazement from all the other boaties within earshot.
JM "You dont have an anchor!! What on earth are you doing at sea without an
anchor, its against the law".
Speedboat owner "Well I didnt know that did I or I would have one. What do
I do now?".
Yes folks, not only did this idjit not have an anchor .. he had no safety
equipment - life jackets, flares, epirb, rope to tie up to the jetty with,
etc. Obviously had just popped down to the local grocery store to buy a
boat on a whim that day coz it was that speedboats first trip to sea :-))

*While having a late afternoon walk down Busselton Jetty casually watched a
family stick their small pleasure craft in to the water. Mother with 2
young girls in tow didnt exactly look like she actually wanted to go to sea
so she just stood ashore observing things. It took the guy ages to reverse
down the jetty in the first instance. He unhitched the shackles that
secured the boat to its trailer & jumped back behind the wheel. Gunned the
engine & shot back planning to slam on the brakes at the last minute with
the idea his boat would slip off the trailer without having to give it a
good push. Slip off it did indeed ... it rocketed off fast. And would ya
believe it he wasnt bright enough to secure a line to the boat on to either
the trailer itself or tie it off on the jetty... so the next step was a
swim out to rescue his boat.

*Two weekends ago during our long w/e break I overnighted in Longreach Bay,
Rottnest Island so I could get two days of diving in. While eating lunch we
watched all the boats whizzing by. I thought a yacht was cutting it a bit
close coming in the wrong way to this bay - it has a marked channel due to
the amount of submerged shallow reef walls .. but I put it in the back of
my mind thinking he would veer away at the last minute. Alas, he kept
coming. All the moored boats who were within eyesight of him were
frantically waving him off .. he just waved back & kept coming. Next thing
his keel is caught between some coral bommies & he's being knocked about in
the wake of every vessel speeding by in the distance. A few dingys shoot
out to push him off the rocks. I didnt offer to jump in with help as I only
had the small dingy with oars, the other rescuers had motorised dingys. It
did look funny though when a few of the rescuers actually hopped out of
their dingys & were standing on the rocks around the yacht. From a distance
they looked like they were walking on water as it was around 10 metres deep
there.

But this is the funniest incident Ive seen SO FAR. Another more $ than
brains case.

*I was down at the Hillarys Marina watching the boats coming in & out after
attending a birthday lunch function in the main restaurant. My eyes nearly
popped out of their sockets when I saw a huge luxury cruiser with folk
partying on her decks .. and others waving to them from shore, blowing
their hooters & such ... when .. gasp! INSTEAD of following the markers out
to sea (ya know, those funny green, red & black triangles on poles ;-))
purposely put there for a reason ie go out this side, go in this side, and
DONT go this way - REEF) ... WHEN the owner of the vessel turned & headed
straight for Rottnest Island. A huge CRUNCH as it ground itself at
fullspeed in to the reef. That night it made headline news in Perth -
luxury cruiser, on maiden voyage, grounded by millionare owner. The good
news - vessel was salvaged. I bet it has a full crew with knowledgable
skipper now ;-)

Wot funny things have you witnessed? Oh, other than watching a certain
somebuddy swim back to the WRONG boat ;-))
Viv