Ballad of the Computer Hillbillies

Come and listen to a story ‘bout a man named Jed,
A poor college kid, barely kept his family fed,
But then one day he was talking to a recruiter,
Who said, “they pay big bucks if ya work on a computer...”

UNIX, that is
CRTs
Workstations

Well, the first thing ya know ole Jed’s an Engineer.
The kinfolk said “Jed, move away from here”.
They said “Arizona is the place ya oughta be”,
So he bought some donuts and moved to Ahwatukee.

Intel, that is
dry heat
no amusement parks

On his first day at work, they stuck him in a cube.
Fed him more donuts and sat him at a tube.
They said “your project’s late, but we know just what to do.
Instead of 40 hours, we’ll work you 52!”

O.T. that is
unpaid
mandatory

The weeks rolled by and things were looking bad.
Schedules started slipping and some managers were mad.
They called another meeting and decided on a fix.
The answer was quite simple:  “We’ll work him sixty-six!”

Tired, that is
stressed out
no social life

Months turned to years and his hair was turning grey.
Jed worked very hard while his life slipped away.
Waiting to retire when he turned 64,
Instead he got a call and escorted out the door.

Laid off, that is
de-briefed
unemployed

Now the moral of the story is listen to what you’re told,
Companies will use you and discard you when you’re old.
So gather up your friends and start your own firm,
Beat the competition, watch the bosses squirm.

Millionaires, that is
Bill Gates
Steve Case

Y’all come back now, ya hear?







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