A first grader was sitting in class as the teacher was reading the story of
the Three Little Pigs. She came to the part of the story where the first pig
was trying to acquire building materials for his home.  She said, "....And
so the pig went up to the man with a wheelbarrow full of straw and said,
'Pardon me sir, but might I have some of that straw to build my house with?'
Then the teacher asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?"  A
young boy raised his hand and said, "I know!  I know!...Holy cow a talking
pig!"  The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

   *********************************
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five
and six year olds.  After explaining the commandment to "Honor Thy Father
and Thy Mother", she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to
treat our
brothers and sisters?"  Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of
a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill".

   **********************************
An honest seven year old admitted calmly to her parents that Billy Brown had
kissed her after class.  "How did that happen?" gasped her mother.  "It
wasn't easy", admitted the little girl, "but three girls helped me catch
him."

   **********************************
One day, a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes  at
the kitchen sink.  She suddenly noticed that her mother has several strands
of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at
her mother inquisitively and asked, "Why are some of your hairs white Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and it
makes me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turn white." The little girl
thought about this revelation for a while,and then said, "So Momma, how come
ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

   **********************************
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.  "Just think how nice
it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say,  'There's
Jennifer; she's a lawyer' or "That's Michael, he's a doctor.'  A small voice
at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher; she's dead."