On 20 Mar 2001, at 23:29, Chris B. McKinney wrote:


>
> You are addressing the issue of responsibility for the fatality;
> Kuty and I were addressing the (separate) issue of psychological
> response to a Death.  There really is no logical conflict in (1)
> blaming the diver for diving beyond his limits and (2)
> sympathizing with those in proximity to him at the time for
> feelings of guilt.  Those feelings of guilt could very well be,
> as you pointed out, just feelings; they don't make the people who
> experience them any more or less to blame.

For what's it worth and for the record, I too feel sympthay for both
the deceased and his family. Granted the person may have done
something stupid, I just can't help feeling "bad" for them too. I also
think it's the family that needs the feelings of sympthy, as they are
the ones left to deal with the aftermath......

I've never done a recovery that I don't feel bad about for the victim.
Many of them have done something very stupid that cost them the
whole show. Many people like to attempt to hide their human
feelings by showing a certain callousness towards the event that
caused the victim to die, but they could not look into the lifeless
eyes of the victim and not feel some sense of loss. Public safety
personnel see this everyday, and you do develop some way to deal
with this on the scene but after it's all said and done and you are
back in someplace private, you spend quite a bit of time coming to
terms with it. Personally it takes me long time after each one
before I can let go of the scene and the results. We each do it in
different ways but in the Public Safety sector we have others that
experience it so we can share some of the stuff that we have to
deal with.

All of the people involved in the incidents that Kuty quoted are
having to deal with their parts of the situations everyday. I'm sure
the question What if........? has been asked many times by these
people...

Mike


>
> > Your narrative seems to suggest (to ME) that you
> > ladies and gents
> > should find a shrink and have a GROUP THERAPY session
> > <:-))> on your
> > guilt-complex.
>
> Now it sounds as though YOU are sympathizing with ME.   :)
>
> > 20-20 hindsight and "Monday-night quarterback" (USA
> > term) are NOT
> > going to teach a victim (especially the DROWNED one) any lesson
> > about self-reliance and self-responsibility he SHOULD
> > have learned.
> >
> > My post-hoc comment/analysis of the tragedy is in the hopes of
> > convincing those readers who are ALIVE to pay more attention to
> > the OWN responsibility and RELY less, much less, on rules that
> > may or may not be applicable to them, and especially
> > NOT to rely
> > on another DIVER for their own safety.
>
> Consider that another effect this kind of discussion might have
> is to make some people less likely to instruct or in any other
> way assume a position of implied responsibility in diving.
>
> Chris