I thought I was done with this and I'll be damned if I'm going to let myself
be drawn into a flame war on this.  I do,  however, have some further
comments which may shed some light or cause some lights to turn on.

In my opinion, Bob defended himself as well as possible when he stated that
he intended no ethnic insult.

I think Bob is now defending himself against what can't be defended against,
how others perceived his comments.  When Bob stated that he had no racist
intent, I believed him and said so.  I still do.  I presume there's no doubt
in anyone's mind that I would not have said this if it wasn't true.
Unfortunately, ethnic slurs are usually defined by perceptions of what is
heard instead of the intent of what was said.  In this case, most who have
bothered to respond, including the most directly affected person, have been
pretty clear on how they perceived Bob's comments.  When one sets out to
communicate, it is one's responsibility to do so effectively, particularly
when the listener's context may be different.  There's no defense against
how others perceive what has been said except to assure them that the
perception was not the intent, appologize for creating the misunderstanding
and strive to avoid making the same mistake again.  Bob has done at least
two of the three.

Bob has suggested that he is due an apology for racist remarks as well.  In
my opinion, he's mistaken.  While there have certainly been things said that
might warrant an apology, I haven't seen any that refer to Bob's ethnic
background and that's the issue in this entire thread.

I started this thread by requesting unspecified others avoid using
derogatory terms as weapons (probably not that clearly, but that was my
point).  I thought and I still think that within the next few posts within a
couple of posts, those who I was trying to address understood what I was
saying and acted to correct the problem.  That was all I hoped for.  It
would be very nice if things were left at that and this series of threads
were to end.

I don't expect it, but it would be nice.  I doubt that anyone is looking
forward to a fight like the one so recently ended.  I'm sure I'm not, I
suspect Bob's not, I hope everyone else is not.

Lee