For all you Democrats:

An Israeli doctor says "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we
can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him
looking for work in six weeks."

A German doctor says "That is nothing, we can
take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking
for work in four weeks."

A Russian doctor says "In my country,
medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one
person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two
weeks."

The Texas doctor, not to be outdone, says "You guys are way behind!
We recently took a man with no brain out of Texas, put him in the
White House, and now half the country is looking for work."


For all you Republicans:

Father O'Malley rose from his bed. It was a fine spring day in his new
Washington, DC  parish.
He walked to the window of his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful
day outside.

He then noticed there was a jackass lying dead in the middle of his front
lawn.
He promptly called the US Senate for assistance.

The conversation went like this: "Good morning. This is Senator Daschle. How
might I help you?"

"And the best of the day te yerself. This is Father O'Malley at St.
Brigid's.
There's a jackass lying dead in me front lawn.
Would ye be so kind as to send a couple o' yer lads to take care of the
matter?"

Senator Daschle, considering himself to be quite a wit, replied with a
smirk,
"Well now father, it was always my impression that you people took care of
last rites!"

There was dead silence on the line for a long moment.

Father O'Malley then replied: "Aye, that's certainly true,
but we are also obliged to notify the next of kin...

* To join/leave the list, search archives, change list settings, *
* etc., please visit http://raven.utc.edu/archives/hp3000-l.html *